Win Love Back: Allow Your Ex Time Space
August 25, 2009 | Leave a Comment
Do you want to win love back? The key is allowing your ex to have a little bit of time to figure out what they want from the relationship. Tim and Rhonda learned this from Tim’s friend Joe.
Rhonda stormed out of Tim’s apartment one day saying she never wanted to see him again. Tim was stunned. All he could think about was how to win love back.
He called his buddy Joe and asked whether he should send flowers or candy.
“Neither,” Joe said. “And don’t call, email, or text her either.”
Tim was stunned by this advice. He wanted to win love back right away before Rhonda had a chance to “look around” and find someone better.
But Joe told Tim that giving Rhonda the space to “look around” was just what she needed. There was a small chance that she would go forever, but the probability was that she would settle down and come back to him. She must come to the conclusion that their relationship was special on her own terms.
Further, Joe advised, it would be bad if Tim looked too desperate. This gave Rhonda the upper hand in many ways. It would lead to further grand gestures in the future. If he wanted to get the relationship back on track, Tim needed to give Rhonda space.
Tim and Rhonda both had a lot invested in the relationship. They had been together 18 months and had even talked about marriage. This was why it was such a blow to Tim when Rhonda walked out.
But Tim took Joe’s advice, as painful as it was, and waited for Rhonda to call. It took her four days, but she finally contacted him.
The first thing she wanted to know was “why didn’t you call me?” He told her “I was waiting for you to call. I knew you needed space.”
He was right, and she knew it. She actually appreciated the fact that he hadn’t called. She knew that he had found a way to win love back.
As they talked about hwere their relationship had been and how to get it back on track, they discovered that one of the problems was that they had been crowding one another. The thought of getting married had been suffocating.
So, they decided to back off. They would still see each other exclusively, but they would make more time for friends and solo activities. They wouldn’t talk about marriage again for six months.
Tim restrained himself from pursuing Rhonda when she needed space. This allowed her to reevaluate her relationship with him on her own terms.
She initially thought that he would call her all the time. She was actually surprised that he didn’t. But, because he refrained from contacting her, she was able to see what her life was like without him in it. And, it wasn’t as pleasant as she had imagined it would be.
So, if you’re determined to win love back, keep in mind that sometime what is needed is a little space.
A Proven Plan To Win Back An Ex
August 21, 2009 | Leave a Comment
Once you’ve been dumped by an ex that you’re still in love with then your main goal is usually to find some way to win back an ex who has broken your heart. What is usually the case though is that most people don’t have a clue where to start and they either rush around sending expensive gifts or making a ton of phone calls – all of which only serve to push their exs further away.
Your opening move to win back an ex, should always be to approach the mission in a calm and relaxed manner. Do nothing that is going to make you appear as desperate and needy because again, your ex will only find it a turn off.
To get yourself in a calm and rational place, you need to take some time out from the heat and drama of the breakup. Too often people don’t take this time out and instead just panic and believe they have to win back an ex by going straight in hard from day one.
As you take this time, concentrate on the things that are going to make you feel good about yourself and what you need to keep your spirits up. So make sure that you’re not spending too much time on your own and that you’re instead out with friends and having some fun. Truly this is possibly the last thing you want to do, but you’d be amazed how much of a difference this one step can make to your prospects of getting back with the one you love.
For the same reason looking after your body is key. When you take the time to do some regular exercise and eat well, you begin to feel focused, less confused and defeatist about what you’re going through. You don’t have to join a gym if that’s not your thing. You simply need to find what works for you and stick to it. It could be as simple as a regular walk or joining a sports team or simply a regular kick around with the kids. Anything that gets you up on your feet and has the blood pumping.
Eating well is also part of this. Don’t fall into the obvious trap of over indulging where food and drink are concerned. It might make you feel consoled initially but eventually it will ruin any chance you might have to win back an ex. So eat well and drink in moderation.
Connect all of these points and you have the beginnings of proven plan to begin the job to win back an ex.
Is Your Marriage In Crisis
August 19, 2009 | Leave a Comment
Is your marriage in crisis? Would you know it if it was? Do you recognize the warning signs? A marriage in crisis can sometimes disguise itself as a normal but slightly boring marriage until it’s too late to change it and save it.
You have to pay attention to all the signs of health in your marriage to make sure your partnership is going strong. First, look at how often you have sex. While sex isn’t the whole point of the marriage—it’s much more important than just that—it’s a crucial part of a healthy marriage.
A marriage in crisis is usually pretty easy to spot by looking at your sex lives. Do you have sex infrequently? Is it a big, scheduled deal when you do have sex? Have you stopped having sex spontaneously just when you feel like it?
When sex becomes a scheduled activity, a marriage can certainly recover. In fact, most marriages go through a phase very much like that when a baby is born. Each child makes it more and more difficult to find the time to spend with our partner over a meal or before leaving for work, let alone finding a spare hour to make love.
But a marriage in crisis never breaks out of that pattern. Instead, even when the time is there the partners don’t have spontaneous sex. Usually there’s very little physical affection shown during the day either. People in love and happy to be together tend to hug and kiss different times through the day.
A loving couple will often touch each other just in passing. One will give the other a fast kiss on the cheek or forehead for no reason. Does this still happen in your marriage? Do you ever sneak a quick pinch or pat on the bottom or a sexy look in the middle of the day?
When these things start to disappear, it can be a sign that the marriage is in trouble. The other thing that goes in a very obvious way is common courtesy. When you say “thank you,” “excuse me,” and “please,” throughout your day to strangers more than you say them to your partner, something’s wrong.
We take our partners for granted in this way, and eventually this leads to a sort of coldness between people. There is simply no reason not to be affectionate and thank our partners (and say please) during the course of everyday life.
The good news is that if you’re seeing these warning signs, you can start working right now to correct them. And you don’t have to make a fanfare about it or announce the change. Simply change what you do.
Make a point of giving affection and unexpected kisses. Be very polite again, and say please and thank you, even when it’s just the two of you. Make time for making love. Do these things and your marriage in crisis could soon be back on track and you could be happier than ever.