Rekindling and Maintaining a Passionate Marriage

October 21, 2009 | Leave a Comment

The passionate feelings wane as with the passing of time in marriages. There many easy ways, however, to rekindle and sustain it throughout the partnership.

It is seldom for people to marry without passion. It is the primary reason that binds the two together. Passion and romance are the essential expressions of love and are mostly the reasons why men or women decide to bind their lives together for better or for worse.

The sexual chemistry among couples has a lot to do with the marital bliss they enjoy. Of course, it is important that they are compatible in other aspects as well but a healthy sexual relationship is helpful in reducing differences into levels where couples can easily deal with them. It is more difficult for couples to adjust with one another when passion has been taken out of the equation because suddenly incompatibilities occupy a central role in the marriage.

An unfortunate phase in a married life is when couples can no longer express their love physically and their bonds tend to become weaker and is further weakened by the stress related to incompatibilities.

With this said, it is important for couples to seek ways in keeping the partnership alive. It is natural for sex life to taper down after years of being together. Yet psychologists tell us that sexual relationships is much better and even more satisfying from ages 40 to 60 years of age. Obviously with the rate of couples seeking counseling to repair tattered relationships, this is not true for many couples. There are many ways to maintain passion in marriage.

Here are a few tips for rekindling and maintaining a passionate marriage. First is to set an appropriate atmosphere. Equating making love to sex is a mistake. Making love is much more involved. It means building up an appropriate atmosphere.

Marriage counselors suggest that making love starts from the time a couple open their eyes in the morning. A gentle touch, a caress and spoken words of love are intimate acts that set a tone, create electricity between the couple that results to a spontaneous and thus more satisfying love making later on.

Keep trim and fit. Part of a healthy married sex life is physical conditioning that keeps you trim and fit all the time. When one is always tired and spent from the hectic activities related to work or housekeeping, love making is farthest from the minds of one or two of the partners. However, as much they would like to make love, their bodies cannot respond which lead to of times of dissatisfaction. One of the ways then to maintain a passionate marriage is to keep fit through exercise.

Set aside time for renewing the ties. When children come, it is natural for couples to have less time for one another. There is work to keep food on the table, ensure education of the children, a house mortgage to pay, housekeeping, etc. Eventually couples drift apart, there is less time to talk and express a well as sustain the feelings that previously held them together. A vacation where couples can be alone to rekindle the intimacy and passion in the marriage is definitely a must.

If a vacation is out of question, just must find ways to have at least adequate time for yourselves once in a while. Alone time is very important. They can resort to dating once again. Doing the things they used to enjoy early in the relationships is a good way to rekindle passion in the marriage.

Communication is very important. You are each other’s strength and there is nothing you cannot handle enough without the other’s support. So whatever it is that it is bugging you, you can always talk it out.

Author Bio: For more information on Passionate Marriage and Nobody’s Ready for Marriage- Marriage.Please visit our website.

How To Stop A Divorce

October 19, 2009 | Leave a Comment

Are you worried that you might not be able to find ways how to stop a divorce? If you’re like most people, you would have tried everything you can think of in an effort to keep your relationship and stop it from falling apart.

Unfortunately, if you’re also like most people, some of those things you’ve been doing to try and figure out how to stop a divorce are actually pushing your partner further away.

Here are some of the things most people do when they think they know how to stop a divorce.

1.    Reassurance

Most people try hard to tell their partner that they’ll change. They reassure them that if they stay in the relationship, things will be different. If you’ve been pleading with your partner to stay and reassuring him that everything will be better, then you could be pushing him further away.

2.    Desperation

The majority of women trying to stop a divorce tell their partner over and over again ‘I love you’. They want him to see how much they care in the hope that it will make him stay. Trying to make your partner understand how much you love him and how much you need him is almost certain to make him want to pull away. After all, if you keep telling him that you can’t live without him and he’s the only one who can make you happy, then he’s seeing that act of desperation as coming from a person who no longer has the confidence of the woman he originally fell in love with.

3.    Talking

Many women spend endless hours talking, arguing, reasoning, analyzing and trying to fix a failing relationship. This tactic never works. In fact, it simply reinforces to a man that the relationship must be in serious trouble if it requires this much arguing and analyzing, so why keep trying? Nobody wants to be married to someone who constantly wants to focus on the negative aspects of everything that’s going on.

While these things are almost normal instinctive behaviors for many women, they don’t actually work when it comes to finding ways how to stop a divorce. What works is taking a step back and looking at your relationship a little differently. It’s time to remove the emotion for just a moment and work on the dynamics of how you and your partner connected in the first place.

Think about when you first met. You would both have been happy and confident and cheerful. It was just fun to be in each others company. You would have been quite happy to accept your partner for who he was and you would have both made an effort to be sure to compromise on some things so you were both happy. Your partner would have fallen madly in love with you because you made him feel happy when you were together.

In order to find a real way how to stop a divorce, you need to figure out how to get back that happy, confident woman your husband fell in love with originally. This is not the same thing as getting a make-over. Your physical appearance isn’t going to change a person’s emotions. You’ll need to stop focusing on the negative aspects of what’s going on and work on your own inner happiness. When you’re happy and confident on the inside, you suddenly become more like the person your partner loves and respects. That’s the woman he enjoys spending time with and that will also be the woman he will stop pulling away from.

When you can raise your confidence levels to that point and avoid all the usual triggers that push men away, you will have learned the easiest way of how to stop a divorce.

How To Build Trust In A Relationship

October 15, 2009 | Leave a Comment

Building trust in a relationship can be very difficult depending on the circumstances. If one partner had an affair, then it may take several years to build trust in a relationship.  It can be done and marriages survive affairs but it will take time. The person who had the affair will need to apologise to his/her partner and then be prepared for that person to learn to trust them again.

But trust is something that needs to be built up in every partnership. After all you are going to share your life with this other person so you need to know that they share the same values as you do. If you are trying to build mutual reliance there are several ways of doing this:

1) Make sure your words and actions match. If you say you are going to be home at a certain time, then make sure you are or else phone in advance to explain why. It is the little gestures that define who we are.

2) Always tell the truth no matter how painful. Lies destroy every type of relationship from friendships through to marriage. Telling the truth isn’t always the easy option but it is the safest. If your partner knows that you always tell the truth, they will trust you much quicker. If they hear you telling lies to others, even those that you dismiss as being small or white lies, they will have less belief in you.

3) Do not keep secrets when in a relationship. Now I don’t mean that you have to tell your new boyfriend or girlfriend your deepest secrets but as soon as the relationship looks like it is becoming serious, it is a good time to make sure that any relevant history is out in the open.

4) You need to have faith in your partner before expecting them to return that trust. If you have to text them morning and night wondering where they are and who they are with, they are likely to think you have something to hide.

5) Don’t be unrealistic. All relationships have issues even those that have been happily married for 50 years. You need to accept that being part of a couple means that you take the good times and the bad. If you bolt at the first sign of trouble, your partner is never likely to trust you.

6) Finally rely on yourself to do the right thing. You must first know yourself and trust in your ability to make the right choices before you can trust anyone else. You have to know what your own goals and aspirations are in life before you can share a meaningful existence with someone else. Somebody with a defined sense of values is more likely to trust another person as they will quickly recognise these similar values.

All good relationships are built on a number of factors so learn how to build trust in a relationship now to increase your chance of success.

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