Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back In 5 Simple Steps

January 31, 2010 | Leave a Comment

So how can you get your ex-girlfriend back in 5 simple steps? Healthy relationship advice is often difficult to find. There is a lot of rubbish printed about how you should ignore her or worse go out with one of her friends. These techniques will not result in your former lover running into your arms. You are more likely to be ignored.

So what can you do to get back on your ex’s good side?  Firstly you need to know why the relationship split up? Did you do something wrong? If so, apologise. Even if this doesn’t result in a declaration of love, you still need to do it. You need to show this lady that you respect her and can admit when you are wrong. Apologies are old fashioned but they work.

Once that is out of the way, you need to start to woo her again. Show her what she is missing. Find ways to remind her of the times you enjoyed together. Perhaps you could find some old photographs and get them printed up and send her a copy.  Perhaps you could find an album of her favourite songs and mail it to her.

Little gestures that prove you are serious in finding out how you can get your ex girlfriend back will work wonders. You could always try asking her directly what she wants. What would make her take you back? Sometimes the only way you can work things out is to be totally honest with each other. You need to face whatever problems you had as sweeping them under the carpet will not work.

It won’t always be easy to get your ex girlfriend back in 5 simple steps. Healthy relationship advice will tell you to have some patience and to take things slowly. You may have hurt this lady a lot and if so it will take her some time to trust you. But with persistence and old fashioned romance you should have a fighting chance. After all, at one point she obviously loved you and you now need to restore those feelings.

Find ways to tell her what you think of her. You could send her flowers or chocolates. Perhaps you could persuade her to come out on a couple of dates with you. Show her a very good time but, what ever you do, don’t put any pressure on her to take you back.

Enjoy your time with your ex-girlfriend.  Make sure the both of you have fun and she can’t help but remember the good times you two had. You need to prove that you are serious and committed to a future with this woman. If you are just trying to get her back to prove a point, shame on you and the horse you rode in on.

Once you follow these tips, you won’t be asking how to get your ex-girlfriend back in 5 simple steps. Healthy relationship advice will always help sort out problems of the heart.

Healing A Broken Relationship

January 28, 2010 | Leave a Comment

Healing a broken relationship isn’t hopeless, but it will be a challenge.  How much of a challenge will depend on many things.

One of the first things that will factor into how you should go about fixing your relationship is why the relationship is in trouble in the first place.  Is your relationship broken because of infidelity?  If so, was it you or your partner that cheated?  This type of relationship can be fixed but it is the hardest thing to overcome and both partners have to be willing to work very hard to make things right.

With infidelity it would seem like the partner who cheated would have to do all the work, but that isn’t really the case.  The truth of the matter is that it will take just as much work for the person who was cheated on to try to overcome their fear of being hurt again, their mistrust of their partner, as well as their anger and desire for revenge.

If your relationship has broken down more gradually over time, this might be a little easier to mend.  Of course, it will still take time and work and you both will need to be 100% committed to working on it.  Many relationships in this category die like a plant in a garden, from lack of nurturing.  It’s not usually a big thing that ends it but rather a series of small, seemingly unimportant, things that will weaken the relationship to the point where it will break very easily.

This type of relationship will take an honest assessment of what each of you has done, or not done, to weaken the relationship.  Once you’ve both admitted the part you’ve played in the breakdown of the relationship, at least to yourself, it’s time to sit down with your partner and honestly discuss what went wrong, what you think needs to be done to make it right, as well as what you personally are willing do to fix the relationship.

This part of the process will be very difficult and will often lead to some horrendous fights.  Why? Because this is the part where you will have to listen to your partner tell you why they aren’t happy with you.  This won’t be easy for you to hear.  And the same goes for your partner when it’s your turn to talk.  Very often one partner won’t be able to deal with what they perceive as criticism when their partner is trying to explain why they aren’t happy.  Once that happens it will often end up in a screaming match and nothing will get accomplished.

This is the point where you, and your partner, will need to grow up. If neither one of you is able to calmly listen to your partner while they try to explain what has made them unhappy in the relationship you won’t have any chance at all of working things out.

Healing a broken relationship isn’t impossible, but it will take work.  If you or your partner aren’t able to be mature and able to face your faults and be willing to work on changing them then you will have a much harder time of fixing your relationship.

Marriage and Partnership - The Power of Two

January 25, 2010 | Leave a Comment

The exponential power of two. It’s one of the great things about being in a committed relationship. When there’s dry cleaning to pick up, groceries to buy, a dog to walk, a UPS truck that’s expected, a lawn that needs mowing, a kid with a tummy ache, windows to wash, and dinner to prepare, having someone share the load makes life a lot easier.

Ditto when you hit the rough spots. Double ditto when you face challenges. Cranky and downright unpleasant. We’ve all been there. Down in the dumps just ‘cuz, or angry over the promotion that went to the bozo instead of you, faced with a scary medical procedure, disappointed by a friend, unhappy on the job, worried about a failing parent, or at wit’s end over your mouthy teenager’s attitude. Scared, nervous, insecure. We’ve all been there, too. Times when we need to accomplish something extra, push ourselves further, and stretch beyond where we think possible. Life. It’s not always smooth sailing. How much easier it is, however, to navigate turbulent times when there’s somebody on your side who believes in you, gently nudges you forward, cheers you on, and has button-busting pride in your accomplishments.

There was a time in my life when I had a difficult decision to make, when I had to either “fish or cut bait,” and “fishing” meant committing $10,000 of hard-earned dollars. I was terrified to take that step. I was terrified not to. I was paralyzed. My husband Dale said to me, “My arm is around your shoulder, my hand is at your back, and I walk by your side. You know what you need to do. Now, my love, go do it.” I took that step, made that commitment, and it led to the publication of my first book. I have never felt more supported or more loved than I did at that moment. And, believe me, a guy like that can get away with imperfections I’ll happily overlook. Being supportive is the loving thing to do. It’s also in your best interest. You’ll rack up more points (or what Dale and I call Frequent Foreplay Miles) than you can ever use. Don’t you just love a win-win?

Is there a time in your relationship when your sweetheart made a difference in your life? If so, then remember this: When your sweetheart is cranky and irritable, or scared and insecure, or for whatever reason is less than the cheerful, high-on-life love bug you’ve come to know, you’ve got an opportunity to return the favor. Take a deep breath, avoid knee jerk (emphasis on jerk) reactions, and be a supportive partner whether the situation is monumental or nothing more than irritation at having gotten a speeding ticket. Being a supportive partner sometimes means sitting silently while your sweetheart vents. Sometimes it means encouragement to offset insecurity. Sometimes it means being brave even when you, too, are afraid. And sometimes it just means loving your partner through his or her indulgently bad behavior.

In the movie, Rocky said to Adrian, “I got gaps. You got gaps. We fill each others gaps.” The power of two. Wow.

Author Bio: Shela Dean is a Relationship Happiness Coach, speaker, and author of Frequent Foreplay Miles - Your Ticket to Total Intimacy. Her book and advice have helped many couples in their journey towards improving intimacy and strengthening marital bonds.

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