Are Men or Women More Prone to Unfaithfulness?
May 27, 2009 | Leave a Comment
Unfaithfulness in a relationship has been a hot topic discussed in many settings, probably since the beginning of time. The basketball court, the beauty salon, and the barber shop, are some of the likely places in which people have been compelled to put their two cents in. We’ve all huddled up in a group or at least witnessed people gather to debate over the roles men and women play in their unfaithfulness. Some debates are heated, and some are even humorous, while others allow women and men to learn more about each other in the process of exchanging ideas, feelings, and attitudes about the impact of cheating and being cheated on. Yet the age-old question still remains: Who cheats more, women or men?
Some men seem to follow a common route when developing an answer to this question. Their initial thoughts are somewhat obscured by their resistance to admit their own unfaithfulness in their relationships. But when probed further into discussion, they’re more willing to confess it as long as they’re given the chance to explain why. When asked if women or men cheat the most, transportation manager Lee Greene replied: “I believe men cheat the most because we can. For me, it was easy. Being away from home a lot made it easy and my cockiness made it easy. But I got a conscience about hurting the woman I was with. I felt like a snake, so I stopped.”
“Women do cheat, but men cheat the most. Women have to think about certain risks if the man decides to walk away, like pregnancy, emotional attachment, and STDs,” said salon owner Alta Haralson. “Men don’t seem to consider all the same risks as much as women do, which would make women less inclined to cheat.” She went on to say that the reason a man goes outside of his relationship to have an affair is due to ego and selfishness. “If he feels he’s not sexually fulfilled by his partner, he goes elsewhere. Sometimes it’s just about being bored with one person.”
Unfaithfulness in relationships can result from numerous issues such as lack of intimacy, feeling neglected or ignored, and emotional withdrawal. Unfaithfulness can also lead to irreversible distrust, revenge, divorce and, in some extreme cases, murder. As vehement as we may be about our opinions on this subject, we must be as diligent in remembering the outcome of some of the most infamous cases of unfaithfulness. To name a few: Joey Buttafuoco and his under-aged sidepiece, Amy Fisher, who shot Mrs. Buttafuoco in the face in the heat of a jealous rage; Basketball star Kobe Bryant, who stepped out on his wife, Vanessa, when he had a sexual encounter with a woman in a Colorado hotel room, after which he was charged with rape; and let’s not forget about one of our nation’s most revered presidents, Bill Clinton, who faced impeachment after lying about his affair with intern Monica Lewinsky. The media had a field day with these cases, crowning men the kings of unfaithfulness.
However, according to Michelle Langley, author of Women’s Infidelity, women are cheating just as much as men and the media have just begun to acknowledge, to a limited extent, the pervasive crisis associated with female unfaithfulness. On her website, Womensinfidelity.com, she asserts that after researching women’s sexuality for more than ten years, she concluded that most of society’s beliefs about females are extremely distorted and invalid. She further claims that after an average of four years of marriage, women in their twenties and thirties experience a pre-midlife crisis similar to the male midlife crisis, which makes women more likely to cheat. She also states that women – under this profile at Stage 3 – have lost interest in sex with their husbands who often have no knowledge of their wives’ affairs.
Finding the answer to the battle of the sexes in the cheating department may go down in history books as having more complex questions and no finite solution. At the end of the day, we’ll never establish the absolute winner of this never-ending contest. And maybe it would help if the question were posed differently by asking “Who gets hurt the most from unfaithfulness in a relationship?” Then we’d all agree – hands down –that nobody ever wins.
About the Author: Mel Bancroft is a contributing writer for ; Regal Black Mens Magazine For more information on this subject visit our ; Lifestyle Section To read about ; unfaithfulness.
Changes in Internet and Cell Phone Habits – Your Spouse Could Be Having an Extramarital Relationship
April 22, 2009 | Leave a Comment
If you’ve got a feeling that your spouse may be having an extramarital relationship, then there’s a strong possibility you could be right. Not saying that every gut feeling is a surefire way to tell that your spouse is cheating, but it is often the first ‘sign’ that you will get that something is wrong. You may have noticed small changes in your spouses habits, or that they’ve developed totally new interests. Regardless, you have the feeling that something isn’t right, and the even worse thought that they might be cheating.
Maybe you’ve noticed that your spouse has recently shown an increased interest in the internet, or perhaps they spend a lot more time on their cell phone. Either of these could be signs of an extramarital relationship. Some cheating spouses turn to emails and constant instant messaging as a means of communicating with the ‘other’ person. Then, some will just stick to their common gadgets like the cell phone. Chances are, if the possibility of an extramarital relationship is looming around in your head, you’ve noticed that your spouse leaves no trace of anything they do online or on their phone.
Big RED flag! Just based on their normal behavior patterns, you can probably determine that there’s at least something going on. Your internet history was never cleared for days at a time, but now it’s completely emptied. Your spouse’s cell phone always had a dozen and one call records, and lots of text messages from you, but now, there’s nothing there. These are definite signs of an extramarital relationship. They’ve all of a sudden become quite anal about these things, and might even be defensive with you if you ask them about it. Two words will be of great assistance to you in this case…digital forensics.
There’s no need for you to stay in the dark about what’s going on with your spouse when you don’t have to be. If you are weary from worrying that your spouse might be having an extramarital relationship, or just a little curious, you deserve to know the truth! You can find several private investigators, particularly those experienced in digital forensics, right online that would be more than happy to help you with uncovering your spouse’s hidden activities, whether it be late night conversations, secret meetings, or something else. Private investigators are able to use digital forensics to reveal what your spouse has been trying to hide. Such methods as cell phone forensic examinations are able to uncover deleted text messages, lost call history and old phone records.
The process is quite simple, and the turnaround for results is usually less than 7 days. You simply send the cell phone off to a digital forensics lab, and then wait for your report. Even if your spouse has a pocket PC, you can also send that for examination. You will receive a full report of all deleted pics, text messages, called ID logs, address book entries, and any other data that can be extracted. Once you have the results in hand, if needed, a private investigator can further investigate the situation for you and possibly reveal even more about your spouse.
There is help available to you, just make sure that you seek the advice and services of a qualified expert. Anytime you are faced with the possibility that your spouse is involved in an extramarital relationship, you should choose a private investigator that is well experienced in the area of infidelity investigations and digital forensics as their work will be the most beneficial to you.
Author Bio: Ed Opperman, president of Opperman Investigations Inc, is an expert in Computer and Cellular Forensics and infidelity investigations. If you suspect your spouse is having an extramarital relationship and need help uncovering the truth visit http://www.emailrevealer.com
How Can I Tell If My Spouse is Cheating on Me?
March 17, 2009 | Leave a Comment
It’s an unfortunate reality that extramarital affairs are so rampant these days, but it is a reality, nonetheless. When you have that “gut feeling” that your spouse is seeing somebody else, or at least talking to somebody else — that is the time to take action and either disprove, or validate, your feelings. Before you confront your spouse, though — one of the first things that you should do is look and listen.
Look and listen — identifying traits of an unfaithful spouse
An extramarital affair can take on a few different forms — person-to-person contact that includes physical intimacy, casual person-to-person relationships that are purely emotional, and purely emotional relationships with no physical contact, which are generally starting points from relationships developed over the phone, through the mail, or over the internet. Regardless of the type of relationship that may be happening, however, there are certain changes that may take place with your spouse, which could be indicative of an extramarital affair.
For instance, if your spouse is engaged in an extramarital affair:
- They may spend a lot of time on the computer, generally in a secretive way.
- They may start to become more distant from you — they no longer share their feelings, concerns, or hopes — they tend to “clam up” instead.
- They become indifferent. If you and your spouse disagree about something, and you used to have arguments, but now your spouse acts as if they do not care — this could be a sign as well.
- They may start to take an out-of-the-blue interest in their appearance. Maybe they start up a gym membership, start jogging, purchase new cloths, or start to wear more makeup.
- They may spend more time at work — either working late, working weekends, or off-schedule trips to the office for ambiguous reasons.
Honestly, while the signs of a cheating spouse are abundant, these signs can sometimes be misleading — there could be any number of reasons why your spouse is acting “suspicions”, and it may not have anything to do with them being involved in an extramarital affair. Any one of life’s circumstances can cause us to act differently, even getting older. For this reason, before you confront your spouse on something as serious as extramarital infidelity, you should have absolute proof that your spouse is, in fact, cheating on you.
There are alternatives to private investigators, such as online investigation services, which will allow a third party to track your spouse’s online activities. This way, if you simply cannot shake the feeling that your spouse may be cheating on you, at least you can have the proof you need to confront them should the need arise.
If you decide to hire a professional private investigator to uncover Internet infidelity be sure to hire one that is recognized as an expert. This is a relatively new field of investigation and requires an expert. The best way to find an Internet investigator is to use the Internet. Try top do a Google search on the PI, his compnay name and web site name to see if they are recognized as an authority on email tracing, computer forensics and infidelity.
Author Bio: Ed Opperman, president of Opperman Investigations Inc, is an expert in Cellular Forensics and infidelity investigations. If you suspect your spouse is having an extramarital relationship and need help uncovering the truth visit http://www.emailrevealer.com.