I Lost the Love of My Life
November 9, 2009 | Leave a Comment
Are you still holding a candle for your ex, telling your friends and family “I lost the love of my life”? If that sounds like you then there might still be hope to get your relationship back. There are some things anyone can do to make an ex fall madly in love with you all over again. You really can rekindle that old flame.
The first thing you need to think about is what might have gone wrong. Stop worrying about telling people “I lost the love of my life” and think about what positive steps you can take instead. When you can identify what you think went wrong in the relationship, you’re in a good position to begin working on tactics to rectify it and then put some things in place to get your relationship back.
All relationships begin filled with excitement and adrenaline. You both want to please the other person, so you make a big effort to look good and say the right things. You both enjoy each others company, because you’re both trying really hard to be enjoyable.
At this point most relationships move into a comfortable phase, where you both feel a little more relaxed. This is the phase where many relationships break up and it can take anywhere from a month to a year to reach this point, and even longer with other people.
Unfortunately, some women misread the signals from their man. They think his comfortable phase means he’s pulling away. Most women’s first instinct is to try hard to bring him closer again. The usual tactic they try is to cling tighter to him, wanting to see him more often and wanting him to reassure her that he’s not leaving.
The reality is men view these tactics as desperation and neediness, which makes them pull away. When their fun-loving, happy girlfriends begin these frantic efforts to cling to them, men feel as though they’ve lost the girl they fell in love with. Instead, they have a stranger who is making him feel as though he can’t do anything right. This is the main reason why men begin to pull away from their girlfriends.
By taking a bit of time out after a break up and working on finding your own confidence again means that you’ll realize you have the power to make yourself happy. You can pursue interests that please you or hang out with friends who make you feel good. These activities should also help you to realize that you don’t need your ex to make you feel happy. You can do that yourself.
With your new self-confidence and positive attitude, you’re in a much better position to call your ex and suggest getting together for a friendly chat over a cup of coffee. Let him see that you’ve found that happy, confident girl he fell in love with and his feelings will come rushing back. Remember, in the beginning of your relationship, it was the happy, easy going version of you that he fell in love with.
No relationship is perfect and of course you’ll have moments where things aren’t so perfect, but by making sure you both enjoy the time you spend with each other, you’ll be less likely to be telling people “I lost the love of my life” and more likely to tell people “I found the love of my life”.
Get more technique on winning your ex or finding the love here:
http://savemarriagehowto.com/go/makingupmagic-4.html
The Emotional Stages Of A Relationship Breakup
November 8, 2009 | Leave a Comment
The emotional roller coaster of a painful breakup generally affects both parties in similar ways. The intensity may be different for the person who wanted the breakup than for the ‘dumpee’, but both people will go through the emotional stages of a relationship breakup.
Knowing and recognizing the different steps for what they are can help you move through the process a little easier. Each stage is necessary so you can heal and be whole and able to find love again some day. Don’t try to shortcut the steps, just remember that after you’ve gone through each step you will be on the road to feeling better.
There is no time limit for how long each step should take to get through. How long it takes will depend on a lot of things such as how secure you are in yourself and what type of a support system you have.
Here are the 5 major steps in a relationship breakup:
- Pain
This will often hit hard and fast. At first the pain can be diminished somewhat by a feeling of disbelief but once that passes the pain can seem unbearable. This is a physical pain. You might not be able to eat or sleep. Everything seems like too much effort. You just want to crawl into a corner and be left alone.
- Denial
This is the step when you start thinking that it is all a big mistake and surely your ex will realize it very soon and the two of you will be back together. That can be a dangerous way to think. It is important that you try to move through this stage as quickly as possible. Lingering too long in this stage can really make it harder to heal and move on.
- Anger
This is when all your fear and hurt turns to anger. You are outraged that someone who claimed to love you could hurt you so deeply. This stage is very destructive and hurtful to both parties and if you’re not careful how you handle this stage you migh sabotage any chances you have of getting back together.It’s also important to make sure you don’t become overly bitter. If you let that bitterness grow too strong it could follow you into other relationships making it harder to ever having a fulfilling relationship again.
- Grieving
At this stage you will mourn your lost relationship. You will often spend a lot of time reminiscing about all the good times the two of you had shared. It is very important to keep a close watch on your mental health during this stage.If you ever feel like ‘ending it all’ make sure you seek help immediately. It is impossible to believe while going through this but you really will love again, if you allow yourself to.
- Acceptance
You will finally reach a point where you realize it’s over. You are stronger and better able to start thinking more about your future and less about your past. This time can be bittersweet: you’ve realized and dealt with the fact that your relationship is over which is sad, but you’re also excited about new opportunities and convinced you will find love again.
The more you know about the emotional stages of a relationship breakup and how to deal with them the easier and quicker you can move on from living in the past to a bright new future. Just make sure you understand that this is all normal and it will get better, just hang in there.
I Miss My Ex Boyfriend – How To Cope
July 29, 2009 | Leave a Comment
Are you saying, “I miss my ex boyfriend” and wondering what you’re going to do? Losing a boyfriend is a painful thing, especially if you really love him. And unfortunately, “I miss my ex boyfriend” is a common cry these days.
You have to decide when the time comes to stop saying, “I miss my ex boyfriend!” and start saying, “I’m going to get my boyfriend back!” It’s hard enough to be missing him without having to worry about strategies to get him back, but they’re important.
These strategies will work even if there’s no chance of you getting back together. They’ll work by helping you feel better about yourself and your situation. It might not be easy to face the fact that you may not get back together, no matter what you do, and that’s normal.
While you’d probably rather hear about that surefire method of getting your boyfriend back, there is no such magic bullet. No one thing is going to miraculously work for every split up couple. If that were the case, then everyone would stay together, for the most part. Or when they did split up, no one would really be hurt by it.
So you can forget about guarantees and absolutes. Everything you try might not work at all. But at least you’ve tried everything you knew how to try, and that’s more than most people will ever do.
“I miss my ex boyfriend” is the battle cry of many women who’ve been involved with break ups .It happens to almost everyone at least once; and for some people, it’s happened more than once. They got through it and came out all right on the other side, and so will you. That’s important to remember.
It’s also important to remember that even though you do everything you know how to do to get your ex back, it may not work, but that doesn’t mean you’re a failure. The tendency is to blame yourself when this doesn’t work out. But for all you know, he has different reasons for wanting to break up and they aren’t things that can be fixed, in his opinion.
As frustrating as it is, his opinion is the one that matters most to him. If he believes it’s hopeless, it’ll be very hard for you to change his mind. You may end up just getting hurt worse if you try to.
But if he seems open to the idea that you want to get back together, then you probably have a much better chance of getting him again. In the long run, getting him back into the relationship after a breakup is the easy part. Keeping him interested for the long haul can be a whole different thing.
Carefully consider when you’re trying to get him back if it’s just that you don’t want to be alone, or that you want to be with him. You don’t want “I still miss my ex boyfriend” to turn into “I want to break up with him.”
You can have access to advance technique on “How to Get My Boyfriend Back” here:
http://savemarriagehowto.com/go/makingupmagic-4.html