Love or Arranged Marriage?
November 28, 2009 | Leave a Comment
Every one believes that marriages are made in heaven. It might be true but then in reality the couples who marry are either in love with one another or the marriage is finalized or arranged by their family members. Debate whether love marriage or arranged marriage is best is never ending as both sides have their experience and testimony to support the system which suits them.
Nothing is wrong in a love marriage until and unless it is accepted by the couple’s family members. Marriage is not just two people coming together but two families uniting to bring two souls together in holy matrimony. Thus the couple in love will have to face the challenges of the community and pacify their family members to accept the partner chosen by them.
In arranged marriages the family first scrutinizes the possible brides, their family and background and leaves the final decision with the groom or vice versa. The whole family support the matrimony during high and low times. They see to it that the couple is happy with one another at all times. Minor misunderstandings are cleared by advice from seniors who act as relationship managers and marriage councilors. With such an expert team around the couple thrive joyously.
Love marriages are mostly done without the family consents. Very few people attend such marriage. Most of the time bides or grooms family is opposing the marriage for some reasons and may not attend the marriage. In an arranged marriage it is grand ceremony wherein the couple takes the vow before the fire god to stay united. Amidst all the relatives and friends they make a commitment to stay together lifelong. A whole lot of sacrifices, adjustments and changes are what goes into a wedding. Overall it is a group commitment among both the families of the couple to stand united and make the marriage work.
Be it arranged or love the primary goal of a marriage is bringing together a man and a women. They commit themselves to be there for one another life long supporting each other in their overall development. They decide to start a family and bring up excellent kids into the society. Falling in love is a natural instinct no one can avoid. But then many people control themselves and allow their seniors to decide their marriage. They wait until the family finds a match for them. This works for some and does not for others. Arranged marriage has its own social dynamics.
Today parents are accepting reality and becoming broad minded enough to accept the choice of their kids in marriage. Times have changed and so is the attitude of people. It is a very positive change to see matrimonial sites with ads saying that caste or creed no bar. The limiting communal boundaries are being broken and it is proof that people want to find the right match other than the right community or caste. Instead of rating between love and arranged marriages it is good to start appreciating the lovely divine institution of marriage.
Author Bio: Rajesh Jain writes on behalf of matrimonyhouse.com, India’s fastest growing matrimonial website. matrimonyhouse.com enables users to create and search Indian matrimony profile on the website. Registering, Searching, and Contacting prospective groom and bride are absolutely free.
How To Win Back Lost Love
October 10, 2009 | Leave a Comment
If you are determined to win back lost love, then go for it. You only have one life and it is up to you how you live it. If you are sure that this person is the right partner for you, go get him/her today.
Be strong and single-minded in your approach. Now you know what you want, it will be easier to ignore everyone else’s advice and well meaning contributions. If this person is your lost love, then trust your own judgement. You know them better than anyone else so you should be able to work out how best to get them to return to you.
Be sure of your motives in particular that you are not trying to rekindle lost love because you are afraid of being on your own. Being single can be fun, it just takes a little getting used to. It is hard to be objective when emotions are involved so it is always a good idea to write down a list of all the reasons why you want this person back. Also write down a list of why the relationship failed. Obviously you would expect the first list to be the long one!
Sometimes people break up and it is the wrong decision. We can all take our lives for granted and as we get older we sometimes wonder if we have missed out. These feelings can cause people to do silly things like walking out on their relationship. If being apart has shown you the error of your ways, then make contact with them and ask to meet up.
If you hurt your ex, you must be prepared to take things very slowly and at their pace. They are unlikely to fall in your arms declaring undying love if you have hurt them badly. If they do, you must still proceed with caution as any lingering problems need to be resolved.
Be aware that no matter how much you miss the other person, there was a reason why you broke up and that needs to be dealt with to prevent it causing fresh problems. There are some things that just cannot be overcome no matter how much we love the other person. The idea that love conquers everything belongs in Hollywood not in real life.
If, for example, you broke up because your partner wants children and you don’t then it is unfair to get back together unless you have changed your mind. Denying another person the chance of having children causes the type of pressure that very few if any relationships can survive. The resentment will probably kill the love you shared.
If you have issues that can be resolved with some mutual work, then go for it. Life is too short to waste time in regrets. Sometimes it is not always the easy way forward to try to win back lost love but often it is the best step you could ever take.
5 Loving Actions That Will Keep Your Love Alive
June 13, 2009 | Leave a Comment
It’s no secret that modern life is fast-paced and getting faster every day. In this world, relationships “and all the work they require” can easily be seen as inefficient, time-consuming and simply not gratifying enough. For your relationship to have a healthy chance at survival, you must take steps to nurture the simple, loving aspects of your union.
5 actions that are essential for your relationship:
1. Hellos and good-byes
Greeting your partner and saying good-bye are quick and easy to do but often overlooked in the chaos of hectic schedules. A warm, expressive greeting can set the stage for the entire day. An affectionate “good-bye” allows you and your partner to emotionally hold on to loving feelings while separated from each other. You’d be surprised how often couples skip this simple way to book-end their days. It may seem easier to put all your morning energies into catching the 7:15 train and overlook taking the time to stop, make eye contact with your partner and genuinely wish him/her a good day. Don’t fall into this trap.
2. Share the trivialities of life
Think back to a time when your relationship was new. What did you and your partner talk about? Probably anything and everything. The excitement of new love propels us to share even the smallest details of our day. Unfortunately that level of sharing often dwindles as relationships mature and responsibilities mount. Focus on the act of sharing to refuel intimacy. The simple act itself is more important than the specifics of what is shared. So make it a habit to share the trivialities of your day with your partner.
3. Learn to laugh together
Shared laughter is a surefire way to keep the connection with your partner vibrant. When you laugh, you’re tapping into the playful energy that transcends life’s stresses. When you and your partner make each other laugh, this energy feeds intimacy and life becomes a little less daunting. Make time for mutual playfulness and make fun of life’s absurdities, this will help you both cope with stress, develop perspective and achieve a greater sense of togetherness.
4. Communicate through Touch
Touch is a powerful way to communicate affection and foster intimacy. Whether you’re sitting across from each other at the dinner table or next to your partner on the sofa, make the effort to increase the amount you touch one another. Touch also has a calming effect on our bodies, so if you want to create a relaxed, loving atmosphere and make your partner feel special, lean into each other the next time you’re at the movies or watching TV.
5. Show your appreciation
It’s human nature to want to be recognized for the things we do. When you express gratitude, your partner receives the message that you are thankful and are not taking him/her for granted. An atmosphere of appreciation will create positive feelings and deepen your connection. Don’t fall prey to the expectation-mindset, where you start to believe that your partner is supposed to do all the things s/he does and therefore doesn’t need to be thanked for them; this mindset creates a dangerous atmosphere of complacency that erodes intimacy.
These five loving acts don’t take much time and don’t cost a dime; but the payoff is huge. You will be taking steps to protect your marriage or relationship from the fast-paced tempo of life.
About the Author: Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. : To uncover other relationship tips, visit Dr. Nicastro’s website at http://www.StrengthenYourRelationship.com and sign up for his FREE monthly newsletter. You will also immediately receive two free reports that can help you build the relationship of your dreams.